This past week has been intense! Last Monday Jess kicked my ass, introduced new exercises, and ended my session with saying "this is just a preview". At one point in my session I tried to re-gain control, and bargain my way through: "If I do this, will you stretch my legs?" Well, the pain held strong, but I did get a stretch.I remember saying 15 minutes in that I was ready for a glass of wine. Okay it wasn't all that bad, I was just letting it all get to my head.

In the moment the pain hurts like a bitch -- all over, but I guess this is why I have Jess... someone to say 'suck it up buttercup, nothing comes easy in life'. She's right. It sure doesn't.

And THEN there's the food. Since I've met Jess, I've realized that there is so much to know about healthy eating that one is unable to learn it all overnight. It's been a few months since I started my workout sessions with Jess and I'm still learning. My biggest challenge is cutting out old habits, so I have gradually made changes like cutting out the creamy salad dressings, switching white rice for brown and adding more vegetables to almost all my meals. The one thing that has helped has been texting Jess on the spot while grocery shopping and asking her which bread is better or what cereal to get. The other day I texted her asking if I could have a personal size pizza with veggies for dinner and she responded "only if it's homemade pizza on a whole wheat pita with lots of veggies and a SPRINKLE of cheese." I got her point and decided to rule out pizza completely and just had a chicken sub instead. Although I am careful with what I eat, I am allowed to have one meal a week where I can really indulge. I first thought it was one full day of whatever I wanted but of course that was wishful thinking.

At one point, this week, I really wanted to throw in the towel. I was so sick of thinking so hard about what I eat - the macronutrients, the balance… But, taking care of myself is my responsibility.

It's all about balance and that is one thing I am learning a lot about. Like Jess would say: just like how you need balance with everything in life, you need it when it comes to a healthy lifestyle. You have to give some to get some. So on I go to another week of being mindful!